Never Second Best Read online

  “Not Matt. She doesn’t want Matt.”

  “Oh.” Of course, the woman always between them.

  “She wants to take them overseas. She’s promising them holidays and weeks travelling from one country to another, but life and kids don’t work like that. They need stability and love. They need Matt to stay their brother.”

  “Seth, I’m sorry. What can I do?”

  “I need character witnesses. You’ve known me a long time and seen me with kids, not only my own.”

  “Of course, whatever you need. I can tell you that she won’t get Matt, the department won’t let her take him out of the country.”

  “Lucy, that’s the hardest part and I still haven’t worked out how to tell him.”

  “Tell him what?”

  “Grace only wants Owen, Eddie and Retha,” his voice so broken she could barely understand.

  “What about Matt?” she asked through his sobs.

  “She doesn’t want him.”

  “Ms Dawson, have you ever been married?” Grace’s lawyer started her cross-examination of Lucy.

  “No.”

  “Have you any children of your own?”

  “No.”

  “Have you ever had a sexual relationship with Mr Greenwood,” Lucy pleaded with Seth’s lawyer to stop the line of questioning, but he gave her the slightest of shrugs. She was on her own, nothing new.

  “Yes.”

  Grace covered her mouth so Lucy couldn’t lip read the instruction to the lawyer.

  “Were you in love with Mr Greenwood?”

  It was as if the pain of Seth breaking up with her all those years ago only happened yesterday. The whole, “it’s not you, it’s me” speech.

  “I’ll ask you again, Ms Dawson. Were you in love with Mr Greenwood.”

  “Yes.”

  “Did you love Mr Greenwood.”

  “Yes.”

  “Do you still love Mr Greenwood?”

  Lucy forced herself to avoid looking at Grace so the woman wouldn’t feel her wrath or know that Lucy was wishing the earth would open up and suck Grace directly to hell. She avoided looking at Seth, wishing she could either lie or stop him from hearing her answers.

  The bitch lawyer knew she was closing in for the kill when Lucy started, “I love him as a man who has made an enormous difference in the lives of dozens of young people …”

  “I asked if you love him.”

  “Ms Dawson, I must ask you to answer the question,” the judge reminded her. Finally, a focus. She turned to the judge.

  “Your Honor, I know that you want a ‘yes’ or ‘no’, but it isn’t that simple. As you heard before, I met Seth when he first started mentoring young men. We were involved briefly and when it didn’t work out, somehow we remained friends.

  “We stayed connected through volunteer work and I had a front row seat to how committed he was to Grace, their marriage and their family.”

  “Ms Dawson, do you love him?”

  “I do.”

  Then the lawyer ripped her credibility to shreds. When was the last time she had been in the house with the children, how often did she see Seth socially.

  “When was the last time that you kissed.”

  Visions of being wrapped in his arms in his backyard as she groaned at her suppressed longing for him, feeling him grow next to her. She couldn’t lie under oath, not even to save herself from humiliation.

  “Two weeks ago. One kiss, and we left it at that.”

  “So you would say that you are incapable of providing an objective reference for Mr Greenwood. Clearly you are besotted with him, to hear how you describe his role in the volunteering he and his ex-wife undertook was very, ‘school-girl’ and not at all in keeping of someone with your experience and qualifications.”

  Nothing left to lose, Lucy ignored everyone in the room, turning on whatever charm remained for the judge.

  “Your Honor. I have dedicated my career and my life to looking out for the best interests of the child. I have never lied or exaggerated in providing a reference in what has probably been thousands of court cases. Most of the time, I am advocating to keep a child safe by removing them from their family. I understand the long-term damage that removing a child from a secure environment holds.

  “Mr Greenwood asked me to testify here today as a character witness. I have known Mr Greenwood for over a decade and I find him of impeccable character. Further, I have known him as a carer, husband, father and now single father. Personally, I cannot speak highly enough of him. His children adore him and with his love and patience, they have come to terms with their mother’s sudden absence from their lives.

  “I can also assure you that Mr Greenwood treats all his children with love and equally. That is why it is so hurtful to him that Mrs Greenwood has elected to ignore their foster son and specifically exclude him from this petition. Mr Greenwood rang me and sought my counsel, my professional opinion, on how to tell one son that the woman he called, “mum’, changed her mind about three children but still didn’t want him.”

  “Personally, yes I do love Seth Greenwood. What’s not to love about the character of the man here today. A man who is willing not only to raise his own children alone, but still willing to provide a safe, loving and stable environment to his foster son. Professionally, I respect the hell out of him and would trust him with any child.”

  “Luc, wait up,” Seth tried to reach her on the steps of the courthouse.

  “Seth, please, don’t.”

  “I didn’t know …” he tried.

  “Yes, you did. You might not have wanted to admit it, but you had to know.”

  “What you said inside. You made all the difference.”

  “Glad it helped,” the raw pain of her outburst still on her face.

  “I kept calling, asking you out.”

  “Don’t you see, I can’t do this again,” eyes glistening, she looked up as Grace joined them.

  “I guess congratulations are in order. You get the kids and the girl,” to Lucy, “Take care of them for me.”

  Seth held her arm, “Don’t react. She’s not worth it.”

  “All those questions, her lawyer tried to destroy me.”

  “Come home with me, dinner with the kids. We’ll get pizza and popcorn again. They’ll be glad they aren’t moving away from their home and friends but will need a distraction to stop thinking about their mother.”

  “At least they know she cares enough to fight for them,” Lucy refused to take his hand.

  “Lucy, what will it take for you to trust me and give us another go?”

  “This,” she massaged the wedding ring still on his right hand, “Isn’t making me feel like you’ve moved on.”

  He kept fidgeting with his ring during dinner with Lucy and the kids. They loved having her over, treating Lucy like a favorite toy to fight after.

  “Sorry kids, it’s a school night for me too, and I need to go,” she left soon after dinner.

  “How can I thank you?” He asked as she stood in the doorway, needing to leaving but wanting to stay.

  Not for the first time, he wondered why he couldn’t move closer until she couldn’t help but be held by him. One more kiss couldn’t hurt, could it?

  Then what? That’s why when she hadn’t responded to his calls he felt relief. After their past and her declaration of love, he couldn’t just treat her as any other woman. She deserved to only ever be held by a man unwilling to ever let her go.

  One day, he promised himself, and soon he would be that man.

  As he closed down the house, he couldn’t help but compare how far he had come.

  Barely any dishes in the sink. The house looked lived in without the chaotic feel from the early days. The kids had photos of their mother in their room, but all the photos of them as a couple were packed in a crate stored in the garage.

  This time when he removed the wedding ring, his hand didn’t look or feel strange without it. He looked for a safe place, ending up h
iding it behind the new photo frame next to his bed – the five of them on a jet boat taken on their first weekend as a downsized family.

  The kids first big smiles enjoying time out on the water with their father. The first of many weekends. There was a whole world waiting for them to explore as a family.

  He didn’t need to see the ring, but wasn’t ready to throw it away, yet.

  Emotional Chaos

  “Are you okay?” Seth’s lawyer asked as they watched Grace and her lawyer leave the office. “It could’ve been worse.”

  “Yeah, well as long as I keep my business and the kids keep their home, she can have everything else.”

  “Luckily, it didn’t come to that. She has quite a nice consultancy income to keep her warm at night, if nothing else.”

  “You saw that, too.” Seth scoffed, “I tried to fake feeling sorry for her, the poor dears can’t agree on which country to live in.”

  “Are you sure you want all this finalized?” Simon grabbed the back of his chair. “You two have been together a long time, do you want to wait and see what happens before I write up the division of assets?”

  Seth didn’t even have to wait to respond, “Get her out of my life as quickly as possible. I’ll sign whatever, as long as I have the kids and never have to deal with her again.”

  “You’ve come a long way since the broken specimen in my office those months ago,” he straightened as his lawyer reminisced, “At the time, I was worried about you.”

  “Don’t be. Now, if that’s all, my charming ex-bride has the kids for the weekend and I have a house warming to go to.”

  “What about the oldest? Matthew.”

  “He refuses to have anything to do with her. I’m hoping that when the ninety-day trial is over and community services agrees he can stay with me, that he will try and forgive her. He deserves a mother figure in his life, and his own mother has decided this is the perfect time to ask the court to formally relinquish him.”

  Seth couldn’t hide his anger, “If ever, and in her words, ‘he can find anyone stupid enough to want him’. I don’t get it.”

  “You know that I’ll represent you, if you want.”

  “You’re a named partner, are you sure these cases aren’t beneath you?” Seth called out enough legal favors on behalf of the vulnerable boys he tried to help and didn’t want to push his luck asking for favors for himself.

  “After all you’ve done for these kids? Consider it a lawyer’s opportunity to get into heaven. And because I’m feeling generous, put me down for another 50 hours of pro-bono work for any other kids you or Lucy think need the help.”

  “Mate,” Seth couldn’t get the words out. Already Simon and his firm donated hundreds of hours towards kids at risk. “I really don’t know what to say,” Simon took his outstretched hand, and he held on for a moment longer. “Not every kid gets the same opportunity as we did.”

  “Well, you give them time and jobs, the least I can do is offer up what I can.”

  “Thanks, well, I’d better go home to an empty house.”

  “What’s Matt doing this weekend while you are being the house warming party animal?” Simon opened the office door for Seth.

  “Sleep over at a friend’s. I’m on my own!”

  “Only if you want to be, I’m sure there will be a lady at the party willing to get lucky with you.”

  Seth just shook his head and left. Doubtful.

  “Oh, Jo, this place is amazing!” Lucy pushed her way through strangers to get to her friend in the kitchen.

  “Yeah, the boys did a great job building me the perfect house for a growing family.”

  “Anything I can do to help?” without waiting for an answer, Lucy took over cutting up the carrot sticks and Jo started on the dips. “Anyone else coming from tennis?”

  “No, there is some netball tournament interstate that their girls are competing in. But there should be a few people here you know and I’m hoping your brother will drop by.”

  “James? I haven’t seen him or Susannah in months.”

  “Yeah, another election is coming up and he is trying to be in a thousand places at once.”

  Lucy floated between conversations with her tray of dips as her calling card. Mostly work buddies of Joe and old school friends of Jo. Not really her scene.

  Jo caught her looking at her watch, “Oh, no you don’t! I’m waiting on a special guest that I want you to meet.”

  “Haven’t you given up on me yet,” she laughed. No one knew why she didn’t date. How could she explain that the only man for her was already married? Even now his marriage had ended, she could never mean more to him than a friend. The kiss so long ago know she doubted he even remembered. “I’m married to my work, and don’t have time for all this,” she waved her hand around. Most people accepted her excuse.

  “Rubbish, in any case, he’s one of our oldest friends and if you give him half a chance, you’ll find you have heaps in common.”

  “I’ll wait for a quick ‘hello’ and then I better go home.”

  “That’s why I adore you – you’d rather go home to save some more kids than meet my hunky friend.” Jo stopped laughing as soon as she saw Lucy’s face freeze.

  “What’s he doing here?” Lucy whimpered, backing away before he saw her.

  “Who,” Jo followed her glance. “Seth, do you know him?” Feigned surprise.

  “You know that I do. I have to go,” Lucy looked for her handbag but Seth caught her at the front door.

  “Leaving so soon? The party hasn’t even started.”

  “I have work to do, I just dropped in for a minute.”

  “Here,” he pulled her towards the couple’s swing on the front porch. “I assume you are the gorgeous, single woman that Jo was planning for me to meet tonight. If we don’t at least talk, she’ll give me hell about you for months.”

  “I suppose you are the ‘old friend’ and if I give you ‘half a chance’ we’ll find we have heaps in common.”

  “Jo knows both of us well and remembers when we were a couple,” Lucy held herself at the end of the swing, not wanting to read anything into sitting with him in the fading sunlight. “Come inside, please,” he continued. “If being around me makes you feel uncomfortable, I’ll keep out the back where I’m sure Joe and some of the guys are.”

  Without words, Lucy let him lead her back inside to Jo who nodded as he whispered something.

  “Come on,” Jo in full party mood, “Let’s get some music happening and replace my old man’s playlist.”

  Lucy was as surprised as anyone when the night wore on and she enjoyed herself, even agreeing to sign up to train for a fun run with a group of Jo’s friends.

  “So, tell me about you and Seth?” Joanne cornered her back in the kitchen, as they cut up another batch of chorizo sausage rolls to put in the oven.

  “Nothing to tell that you probably don’t already know. I dated him a few years ago, told him I loved him and then he disappeared. A year or so later, Grace turns up back in his life and I realize it really wasn’t me, it was him.”

  “Forget about her,” Lucy smiled as Jo gave her a quick hug. “That bitch has messed him up for so many years, I’m glad he’s finally over her.”

  “Well, now you know why I don’t date,” Lucy shrugged. “I always saw him as the perfect man and no one else ever compared.”

  Jo opened the oven door for Lucy to put the trays in, “He’s single now.”

  “But is he really over her?”

  “A couple of months ago, I would have said ‘no’. But even Joe sees the difference in him. Ever since she handed over full custody, his attitude has changed. He doesn’t like her as a person, respect her as a mother or love her as his wife. For the first time since high school, he is emotionally single.”

  “I wish I could believe you,” Lucy didn’t dare to hope. What if the kiss was real?

  “Then what?” he asked as Jo and Lucy peeled themselves from the floor laughing.

&n
bsp; “Jo got up, apologized for thinking he could play at her level, and walked off the tennis court,” Lucy giggled.

  The other guests left hours ago, and only the four of them sat in the lounge room, not willing to replace the port with coffee. As Lucy straightened herself next to him, he pulled her legs across his lap.

  For him it was the first step towards whatever they could have together. Too much to hope they could have a fresh start without the baggage of the years but it could be one small step towards something.

  As the friends continued to trade stories, Seth wondered about Lucy. He wanted to take off her shoes and massage her feet, knowing she had been on them all day. The curves of her calves begged for him to stroke them, but he knew if he started, his hands wouldn’t stop at the base of her skirt.

  “Help me with coffees?” Joe helped his wife to her feet, with an obvious wink to Seth. “Be good you kids while mum and dad are out of the room.”

  “Glad you stayed?” he sat up to be closer to her, hoping she would meet him half way.

  “It’s not what I expected.”

  “What,” he leaned in until a breath was all between them.

  “You, me, us. I didn’t expect …” he couldn’t help himself anymore, silencing her with a kiss.

  Their lips met in a gentle dance. Soft nibbles morphing into hungry foraging. He felt an explosion within him, wanting this woman, oblivious to their surroundings. She tasted of the sweet wine from her empty glass. With one kiss, she cleansed him of his hurt and loneliness. Answering his own question, yes he could want another woman as long as it was this woman.

  Her hands reached for his chest and he tensed, wanting her to feel his muscles underneath the shirt and delve lower to find what else awaited her. Only when they heard Jo’s high heels on the polished floorboards, did they break away.

  “Oh, my,” he heard Lucy softly utter. Oh, my indeed, he agreed.

  He clung to the coffee, barely conscious of the banter between the other three as he remembered another party with Joe and Joanne as the last guests. Leaving him alone to make love to another woman, the woman he had loved for so long. The woman left her girlfriend to come back into his life, bare his children only to walk out again.